Saturday, August 22, 2015

Your Dreams VS Family..Who Wins the Title?(and your dreams takes home the belt..KO for family)

Sounds like a crazy title huh? But noo seriously that's what I heard... FROM A CHRISTIAN PASTOR! :0

Well, he didn't say those exact words..but after I watched and re watched the television, I was in shock.
Trust me, I wouldn't be alarmed if it was from a non-Christian, because the they do not uphold Godly standards anyway so of course they might have this mentality. But hold up, scratch that, I'm sure even some non-Christians wouldn't even have this perspective.

But I just came back from the store, I'm making oatmeal no-bake balls! They have honey, raisins, vanilla, brown sugar...YASSSSSS! So you know I'm up in the kitchen, doin my thanngggg, making my oatmeal balls and I heard somthing that really annoyed me... like annnoyyyeeedd me. I was making my oatmeal balls..and I over heard that..I had to stop what I was doing with the honey and peanut butter on my hands and sit down and listen to what was actually being said because I could not believe my ears.

** Disclaimer: I am in no way shape or form attacking this person...well, I am attacking what he was saying...but if I do come against what people say here on this blog..I won't say the names. Now you can use your context clues and the power of Google if you want...but I'm not here to slander anyone because we are all in desperate need of God's grace. But it doesn't mean I cannot disagree with what they were saying...because I do think it was very misleading and not biblical. And I'm also learning to PRAY for those people who have strayed from Biblical principles instead of attacking so God can lead them back into his Truth. Heck, I pray for myself daily so that any lifestyle or action of mine that is contrary to the Word of God...that God convicts me of it, with Love (like he always does and how we are called to do) so that I might see my fault and let him cleanse me of it. Because even if my human/sin nature wants to do/think the way I want to think..I want HIS will to ALWAYS prevail over mine. **

Okay, back to the story. So basically. He was saying, like directly very clear, and trust me I re winded it several times on the DVR to make sure I was hearing clearly. That his wife (of over 20 years) was holding him back from his dreams of worldwide ministry because she wanted him to be home more often with the family. And then, he said that she was holding him back from his dreams. But MARRIAGE IS YOUR FIRST MINISTRY AND MOST IMPORTANT MINISTRY!He always basically said that he didn't understand why his wife needed him home because they're daughter was 16 years old.... Um...16 year olds need their fathers as well! If not more at that age! He said that they grew apart because she wasn't the right one and then he went on to market his new book that is all about helping you pick the'right one.'

Now, not saying the wife was all perfect, but his excuse was that he was called to preach the gospel all over the world and he felt that his wife was holding him back becauwe she wanted him home more. But if your family is falling apart because you are too busy 'preaching the gospel' and building ministries, you kind of are failing. Your marriage and your family is your first ministry. Your wife is YOU. You are no longer one person anymore. You are your wife, and she is you. I mean you are still a person in the sense that you have individually and all that, but two become one in marriage. Marriage is all about representing how Christ died for his church and sacrifice his life for her to present her without spot or wrinkle. So basically, marriage is all about dying to yourself , sacrificing your will to serve your spouse. Not about creating spotlights.

He said that they grew apart, but I don't think they grew apart, I believe their selfish motives and sin nature and pride allowed them to stop serving each other and they just quit.

I just think it's really sad the fact that he said he has no regrets and if he could do it over he would chose his ministries over his wife. And I think it's sad that he has a book telling you how to find the 'right one'. Okay, so if that 'right one' you find makes you mad, are we allowed to leave them? There should be no sacrifice, or dying to ourselves! That's just too much!

I not trying to get in their business, but he was so sure and confident about what he was marraige really dosn't take all that...When they make you mad, just leave, don't examine yourself.. Hmmm...maybe this is something I need to look at in my own heart as well. I can be very selfish sometimes, and want things my way. I want Christ to work that out of me. He is so lonnnggsuffuring, he is so patient and loves me through all my FOOLISHNESS !

So maybe God is using this so I can examine my OWN heart. Will I leave this Christian walk when things get hard? Will I still want to write a blog if it would cost me my life and freedom? Would I still want to do ministry if it required me to go to the poverty stricken places of the world instead of the beautiful megachurches of America?

It's time for me to have a heart check for myself. I encourage you to ask yourself these questions as well. I have a desired to be married one day, and I want to truly serve my husband and when I don't FEEL like it. You know, I want to be able to endure and not just quit when things get hard. I want to examine myself first instead of blaming the other person for everything not wanting to expose any of my shortcomings (which I used to do a lot, so I need to keep that in check). But most importantly, I want to pick up my cross daily and die to all my selfish ambitions and look to the cross.

Anyways..I still have no regrets on speaking on this subject after hearing that interview.He has a lot of influence in the Black Chrisitan community, and all Christians need messages of strong marriages..but especially in the Black community because broken homes are something that we have become too used to seeing.

But be that change you want to see in the world.

Love you guys!

Oh yeah, my oatmeal balls weren't sticky enough so I'm just eating it like cereal instead...but it was very tasty...even without the awesome shape..

love you guys, I'm about to go to bed..

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