Saturday, September 19, 2015

"Let God handle your Depression..It's not my Problem"




****Please watch both videos posted to understand fully the message of this post**** 


It was nothing but God. I swear, Gods been revealing himself to me so much lately.

Also, I have been praying.. "Lord, get out anything in me that's not like you. Reveal those secret sins hidden in me that I try to repress from myself."



AND BOYY HAS THE LORD BEEN DOING THAT. AND WOW I am filthy....

But this is ALL GOD RIGHT HERE..

So yesterday I was listening to a KB album on YouTube . Mind you, I never just listened to a KB album, I always used to by pass his music for some reason and jam Andy Mineo or Lecrae. Not intentionally, but I just assumed that his music wasn't my type of vibe.  (wrong mistake he JAMS)

So I was just working on the framework of my blog and I had his new album playing on my laptop. I went away for a over 25 minutes and I was already half listening...the music was cool, but I was working on stuff. Kind of like background music, you know?

So, I came back and I felt the Holy Spirit say, "Listen to this song!" So I did. And I was captivated. 

It wrecked me. 
It broke me.
It EXPOSED ME. 
It hurt.
But the hurt was bred out of my need for that sin to be exposed...to feel the pain that people in my life have felt because of my standoff-ness.

The song is called "Calling on You".


Take a listen real quick. 


The lyrics had me captivated. And convicted. 

I went to a popular music lyric sight to read the lyrics as I listen to let the words saturate my spirit, and on the thumbmail was this video. 

"Watch it" the Holy Spirit said. 

Here is the video--watch it for yourself--



Wow, when KB said he undermined Jason's pain. Saying, (paraphrasing here) 'you know, that's just something he's going to have to deal with and learn through. You know, we all go through stuff". Basically thinking it wasn't that serious and if it was, well..you know.'

See, the side you readers see of me on my blog, or my friends, or people I minister to, I give them so much grace and love! I'm always there if they need me, I'm always reaching out, and praying for them, sharing to them how Christ loves them. Just SHOWING THAT LOVE. LETTING CHRIST SHINE THROUGH ME.

I KNOW I CAN NEVER GIVE ANYONE JOY..I CAN NEVER END SOMEONES DEPRESSION. I CAN NEVER STOP SOMEONE FROM CONTEMPLATING OR STOPPING SOMEONES SUICIDE....

                                                  BUT I HAVE DIRECT ACCESS TO THE ONE WHO CAN. IF I JUST LET HIM SHINE THROUGH ME AND SAY AND DO WHAT HE CALLED ME TO DO FOR THAT PERSON. 

But too the one's closet to me...the one's I know who need Christ's love the most..

I bash them.
I think to myself, "why havn't they changed...don't they know they are killing themselves"
If they stop doing that they will be happy.

They told me all I do is point out their flaws....But I say 'no I don't.'
but looking back..and as God as getting everything that's unlike him out of me...I did absolutely that.

I WOULD ALWAYS PREACH ABOUT HOW IF YOU DON'T CHANGE YOU'RE GOING TO HELL. HOW DON'T HAVE SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE..DON'T TO THAT..WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS..WHY HAVEN'T YOU CHANGED...WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU..

....................but there was no love whatsoever...

I was always screaming ....I'M A CHRISTIAN...but my fruit was so far from that..

NOW TO EVERYBODY ELSE...I give them so much fruit..love..compassion..grace..

but to those closet to me.. MY HEART IS SAYING "IM SO FED UP WITH THIS..WHY DO THEY CHOSE TO LIVE LIKE THIS.." MY ACTIONS ARE BEING RUDE..AND SNARKY, ACTING LIKE I'M SO MUCH BETTER THAN THEM." 


If you listen to KB's interview...he said this song is what he would have said to Jason..but he didn't. 

God has us to form relationships and to be a light in this dark world FOR A REASON. We can't pick and chose who we think deserves to feel his love... like I was doing.

I love that this song is not a guilt trip. We are human, we cannot save people. But, just know, it's humans who show the love of God to each other. Yes, the Holy Spirit fills you with love supernaturally but Christ works through humans. When I decided to give my life back to Christ in September of 2014, after watching Heather Lindsey's "Runaway Bride", I was in tears and I knew the weight of the love Christ truly had for me. It wasn't because I was scared of hell in that moment..it was because of love. Love transformed me. Better yet, the LOVE OF CHRIST TRANSFORMED ME.

BUT what if Heather Lindsey didn't make that video? Yes, he could have got another member of the body of Christ to fulfil it...but there would have been delay and people would have missed that message. 

PEOPLE NEED YOUR OBEDIENCE. THIS LIFE IS NOT A GAME. OUR SOLE PURPOSE HERE IS TO SHOW CHRIST'S GLORY TO WIN SOULS FOR HIM. THAT'S IT. 

SOMEBODY IS WAITING RIGHT NOW ON YOUR OBEDIENCE. 

Today is not the time to listen to your emotions. DUDE, MY EMOTIONS CHANGE EVERY 2 MINUTES .....THEY ARE UNSTABLE AND UNRELIABLE THAT'S WHY I NEEEEEEDD THE HOLY SPIRIT TO LEAD AND GUIDE MY EVERY MOVE. 

Like I mentioned before...this is not a guilt trip. I prayed for God to expose my faults..because too many times I can focus on their faults...thinking I'm this perfect Holy Ghost sacrificed Christian. Which I am...only I'm FARRR from perfect. 

God created us for community. God created us for relationships. God created us for showing unconditional love to one another. God also created us to give grace. Not be be a know it all and self-righteous like I had become. I'm still working on it.  God's still working it out of me. 


But I'm have to remember...that it's the love of God that Christ shows through you that changes people...not your constant condemnation. You can still operate in truth...hold strong to your convictions..but make sure you are operating in the Spirit of Christ...and not in self-righteousness..








Love you guys,
Stacie Dickson 



*** KB interview is property of Rapzilla.com and KB song, "Calling on You" is property of Reach Records. **

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